Decrease of confidence in my life.........

Confidence is something everyone in life must have to continue their life, to get well in their life, to be great in life too........
So it is a very important thing everyone should have...........
Think back of last time during primary, I still live life with full of confidences.........
Then I got a kinda great impact from a girl I like........
Well it's just a kind of feeling towards her that time........
Now still having a little though.........
After the impact, my confidences got decrease by it.........

The other source is from one of my best friend forever, Yu Zun.......
Since primary he is like saying me ugly......
Now I still remember what I did after that........
I went to toilet and look at my own reflection for almost half an hour.......
Backed home I still go back and look myself in the mirror..........
Well primary it's the 1st time getting this comment.......
So I was curious.........It was stupid though..........
It's was also a quite good comment..........
Now I'm immune to all those comment saying my outer appearance.......
Either is good or bad.........

Then I used to volunteer to do a lot of stuffs........
Some people will start talking bad about you.......
From the others that are not helping, the one who requested help.........
What I heard was 'he wants to get famous is it?', 'go act kind give people see meh?', when I done it not really good or badly, they will say 'Don't know how to do don't volunteer la'.........
What's wrong volunteering yourself helping people and get this kind of repay?
So my confidence decreased again.........
Sometimes or most of the time I'm thinking that we shouldn't get our ass in something non of our business..........
Those impact on my are really great.........
>_<

That can make me remember up till today..........
This morning I get the other one of the greatest impact in my life............
In the eyes of one of my best brother(not bloodline again), I'm valueless.......
My value in his life is MUCH more lower than a cap......
Or should I caps the CAP since it has GREATER value than me..........
My name should be written this way lee kau chek.......
=')
He kind of inform me, "A term of value, do you understand?"............
Maybe I really do not understand.........
But now I am seeing CAP(value)>lee kau chek(value)..........
Or should I make it a [CAP from Marcus](value)>[lee kau chek](value)...........
No matter how the equation above..........
It's clear that my price is MUCH MORE CHEAPER than a CAP........
Maybe I really just worth RM1.70........
For your information it's my new nickname created by his brother........
RM1.70 in Cantonese is kau chat ~ kau chek...........
Confidences in life?
I got lesser and lesser when life goes on........